I lose everyday.

I lose everyday from my son, because i have no idea how to take care of him, like his mother did. Each day i will be disappointed of myself, I lose everyday. I die inside everyday. Have no earthly clue how to move ahead. I never wanted to move ahead. She was everything i had, everything i strived towards. Each and every passing day is the worst reminder of the loss i have taken. And this time around, i know it will never go away and this time around it will stay forver, the depression of losing forever.

Never mattered, that i lost something, i knew the damage and the days of hard work i needed to do cover up for loss. But this time around, i got Nothing. I have nothing. I have nothing left in me. I want to end myself every passing moment. Hopeless, Tired, Loser living his life a moment at a time.